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The importance of a BATNA -

When you're negotiating or bargaining, you’re essentially powerless if you cannot walk away and take another deal, which is why a BATNA (best alternative to a negotiated agreement) is so important.

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What's a BATNA look like? -

What might this look like? It might look like being able to reject an offer completely, to walk away. Good negotiators will spend a lot of time finding out the best alternatives.

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Know who you're negotiating with -

Imagine how business people negotiate. Big players in these worlds know a lot about each other for a good reason. If you know about the person, you know their strengths and weaknesses and can use it for or against them.

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Establish the ground rules -

Start with the rules surrounding the process of negotiation. It’s often counterproductive to assume that both parties will instinctively know who will start, who should present first, and where it will physically take place.

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Avoiding confusion -

Instead of doing this, it’s a lot simpler to begin by suggesting that you will start and then they will go, and generally how things should proceed. It clears the way for the tasks to be discussed without confusion.

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Small talk goes a long way -

Research shows that when people engage in small talk at the start of the negotiation process, both parties are much more likely to collaborate better afterward. As you might expect, collaborating effectively usually means that both parties are more likely to reach an agreement than if they arrive at the negotiation stage as strangers.

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Listen with every fiber of your being -

Once the negotiations start gaining momentum and are exploring issues in real depth, not listening intently is probably one of the biggest mistakes that someone can make. Essentially things will just go over someone’s head and they might agree to do something they didn’t intend to.

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Double check you have understood -

To make sure you understand correctly, try paraphrasing what a person has said back to them once they have finished speaking. In doing so, you’re essentially just checking to see if you’ve understood them correctly.

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Is their language emotionally charged? -

Try to listen carefully enough to the language being used so you can decipher difficult feelings like frustration behind the message. This is valuable information. It also increases the likelihood that you’ll be listened to as well.

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Ask good questions -

Asking good questions is key to good negotiating skills. Avoid asking 'yes or no' questions because you’re less likely to get helpful answers.

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Leading questions don't help you learn -

In the spirit of extracting information from the person you’re negotiating with, it's usually best to avoid leading questions such as “don’t you think that’s a great idea?”

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Distributive negotiation (win-lose) -

In a distributive negotiation (a competitive negotiation where one side loses and the other wins), it’s often the case that negotiators get stuck on one single issue, such as price.

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Integrative negotiations (win-win) -

In integrative negotiation, much like the negotiation processes that take place in Chinese business cultures, both sides present multiple issues to get what they want.

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It requires a little give and take -

It’s a win-win negotiation process. In this kind of negotiation, it’s valuable to identify what your counterpart cares about a lot that you don’t and are willing to give up. Interests include the needs, desires, concerns, and fears important to each side.

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Benefit by trading in more than just the monetary -

This is a very useful negotiating form that you should try to capitalize on. You can present multiple issues.

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The first number mentioned bias -

It’s been proven that the first number that’s mentioned in a negotiation process has massive influence, even if the number is only uttered arbitrarily.

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Anchoring bias -

This can be used to your advantage in a negotiation by “anchoring bias” via making the first offer. If you do it first, it will have tremendous influence.

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Multiple offers -

Consider presenting multiple offers at once. If your counterpart rejects all of them, ask them which one they liked best and why. You’re increasing the chance that they’ll go for at least one.

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Bridging the gap -

From here, there is at least a point that you can start negotiating from. It’s a middle ground. It can be the final deal, but it doesn’t have to be.

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Disagreeing on what will happen down the line -

Negotiators often get stuck by disagreeing about a scenario that will play out over time. Essentially this is a difference in opinion or a difference in the production of what the future will bring. A contingent contract solves this problem.

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Contingent contract -

This is essentially working a bet into the negotiation of how the future will unfold. A contingent contract will penalize a contractor who fails to finish construction in the agreed time frame, for instance.

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Following through -

Plan for the implementing stage. Another way to improve long-term durability is to have milestones and deadlines that ensure that what is said in the negotiation isn’t just hot air.

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Having to renegotiate isn't a defeat -

It might be agreed that if things change that renegotiations may have to take place. This is nothing to be afraid of. It’s pretty common. Things change and plans change. 

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Be bold. Be brave -

In the spirit of not fearing that you might have to eventually enter renegotiations, it’s important to be bold and brave. Don’t ever apologize for what you want or ask for. 

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Desperation tax -

This ties in with the previous point of being able to walk away and say no. To be able to be confident you need a BATNA. Be aware of the “desperation tax.” Normally the person who can’t do without something comes out worse.

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Approach negotiation like a group problem-solving session -

Negotiations are, at heart, a problem-solving process, or at least they should be. Watch out for language like “me" and "you” and think in terms of “us" and "we.” Attack the problem, not the person!

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Learning and evolving -

Experts at negotiations will often have a natural capacity for it but are usually that way from tons of experience and learning from their mistakes and wins. Modify your technique so that you get better. It will usually happen naturally anyway when you leave a negotiation with nothing or less than you asked for.

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The sunk-cost dilemma -

Avoid being a victim of the sunk-cost dilemma. Even though you may have had three or four meetings and there’s just one issue to solve, it’s sometimes still worth walking away. The sunk-cost dilemma is known as a greater tendency to continue an endeavor once an investment in money, effort, or time has been made.

Sources: (Harvard Law School)

See also: Simple ways to have a better conversation

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