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See Again
© Getty Images
0 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Knight -
Jonathan Knight was told his career would be over if he came out. The New Kids On The Block singer spoke on the 'Frosted Tips with Lance Bass' podcast about his experience in the band's early years and explained that his manager knew he was gay. "He pulled me aside and was like, 'If anybody finds out, your career is over. The New Kids' career is over. My career is over,'" Knight recalled. "It was just so much pressure."
"Looking back, that was a lot of pressure to put on somebody who's just trying to figure out the world themselves," he continued. "As it went along, the stress built up and built up and built up." It filled him with anxiety, and yet it was still several years before he came out—and not by his own choice.
© Getty Images
1 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Knight -
Knight was outed after his then-boyfriend sold photos of them to the National Enquirer, though he still didn't want to make a formal announcement. "I didn't want to. I was just living my life... it wasn't something I was hiding," he recalled. "But then it was like, 'No, you have to make a statement. You have to clear the air.' And that whole process was horrible." It was a huge injustice to Knight every step of the way, but fortunately times have changed, and now he's happily married to longtime partner Harley Rodriguez.
© Getty Images
2 / 35 Fotos
Ricky Martin -
In an interview for People's Pride issue, the singer recalled being asked about his sexuality—something he'd not yet shared—on TV by Barbara Walters. When Walters asked him to shut down the rumors that he was gay, he refused to answer at first, then eventually said, "I just don't feel like it."
© Getty Images
3 / 35 Fotos
Ricky Martin -
Martin later explained in 2018, eight years after coming out, on 'The Daily Show' that the decision to come out had been so difficult because his loved ones were telling him it would end his career. Being confronted on TV about it, and being encouraged to "shut down the rumors" was a violating experience, and the singer admitted that he still has "a little PTSD" when he thinks back on Walters' invasive interview.
© Getty Images
4 / 35 Fotos
Kristen Stewart -
The actress told Harper's Bazaar UK that she was informed very early on in her career, by "an old school mentality," that she shouldn't discuss her personal life because people might not like it, and even that she should stop going out publicly with her girlfriend so that she could get bigger roles.
© Getty Images
5 / 35 Fotos
Kristen Stewart -
"I've fully been told, 'If you just do yourself a favor and don't go out holding your girlfriend's hand in public, you might get a Marvel movie,'" she said. "I don't want to work with people like that."
© Getty Images
6 / 35 Fotos
Colton Haynes -
The 'Arrow' star said that almost immediately after moving to LA to pursue acting, he was told he couldn't come out as gay. That kicked off years of internal struggle, which sadly landed Haynes in rehab for anxiety.
© Getty Images
7 / 35 Fotos
Colton Haynes -
"I was literally told from the day that I moved to Los Angeles that I could not be gay because I wouldn't work. Then I was with my management team and a team of people that just literally told me I couldn't be this way. They tried to set me up with girls," Colton told Andy Cohen, explaining that all his rumored hetero romances were lies.
© Getty Images
8 / 35 Fotos
Cara Delevingne -
The model and actress was once told by Harvey Weinstein that she would never make it in Hollywood as a queer woman. She said he advised her to date men to cover it up, while also making inappropriate comments about her relationships with women.
© Getty Images
9 / 35 Fotos
Cara Delevingne -
"One of the first things Harvey Weinstein ever said to me was, 'You will never make it in this industry as a gay woman—get a beard,'" Delevingne told Porter.
© Getty Images
10 / 35 Fotos
Ezra Miller -
The 'Flash' actor came out in a 2012 interview, but it wasn't so simple. They wouldn't name names, but Miller said people both inside and outside the industry lectured them on having "done a 'silly' thing in... thwarting my own potential to be a leading man." Miller said they received "a lot of stern talking-tos" after the interview and was told that they had "made a mistake" by being honest.
© Getty Images
11 / 35 Fotos
Ezra Miller -
"I didn't think I'd done anything wrong, though there have been moments of doubt as a result of those conversations," Miller told ShortList. "But...what they said was, in fact, 'rubbish.' We are the ones. It's up to us to manifest the world we want to exist in."
© Getty Images
12 / 35 Fotos
Evan Rachel Wood -
The successful actress came out as bisexual in 2011, but she was advised not to. "They tell you flat out—'Don't do it.' They don't want you to be less desirable to men," she told IndieWire. "Because that sells tickets and that helps your career."
© Getty Images
13 / 35 Fotos
Evan Rachel Wood -
Fortunately, Wood added, "Nothing happened that people told me was going to happen...You might be leaving one community behind but you're getting embraced by another."
© Getty Images
14 / 35 Fotos
Raven-Symoné -
The former star of Disney Channel's 'That's So Raven' has since opened up about how the network controlled her image while growing up, which included her sexuality.
© Getty Images
15 / 35 Fotos
Raven-Symoné -
She said she knew she was a lesbian at age 12 but only came out in 2013, after her run with Disney. "My likeness, whether you see it in an interview, whether you see it in print, however you see it at that time, had 15 people dictating what I should and should not look like. If I did whatever I want, I'm not going to sell because it doesn't go with the brand. I was branded at such a young age," she told L/Studio.
© Getty Images
16 / 35 Fotos
Elliot Page -
Before Elliot Page came out as a transgender man, he came out as a lesbian, against the advice of many in the entertainment industry. "There's this narrative that people are attached to: You cannot come out because it's going to hurt your career," Page told Variety. "And that's potentially true. When I made the decision to come out, I wasn't naive to that."
© Getty Images
17 / 35 Fotos
Elliot Page -
Page added that back then he was "pressured—forced, in many cases—to always wear dresses and heels for events and photo shoots. As if lesbians don't wear dresses and heels. But I will never let anyone put me in anything I feel uncomfortable in ever again," Page told Net-a-Porter.
© Getty Images
18 / 35 Fotos
Amber Heard -
After she came out as bisexual, the actress was told that she was "throwing away" her career, which at the time was landing roles opposite the likes of Nicolas Cage and Johnny Depp.
© Getty Images
19 / 35 Fotos
Amber Heard -
She said that people advised her to stay in the closet for the sake of her career. "And I said, 'I cannot do this any other way. Watch me,'" Heard told Allure. "They pointed to no other working romantic lead, no other actress, that was out."
© Getty Images
20 / 35 Fotos
Matt Bomer -
The 'White Collar' actor decided to come out at a pivotal moment in his career, when the risks were made very clear to him. "I had a studio film that was about to premiere, and a television series coming out. But to me it was more important to be my most authentic self, both for my family, and for myself," he told Attitude.
© Getty Images
21 / 35 Fotos
Matt Bomer -
He has no regrets about coming out, but he acknowledged that it certainly wasn't a fairy-tale process. "To say that didn't cost me certain things in my career would be a lie. It did. To me that trade-off was worth it," he added.
© Getty Images
22 / 35 Fotos
Samira Wiley -
Early in the 'Handmaid's Tale' actress' career, she was encouraged to hide the fact that she is a lesbian. Wiley even said that it was suggested that she pretend to date her gay male friend to cover up both of their sexualities.
© Getty Images
23 / 35 Fotos
Samira Wiley -
Wiley said on the 'Make It Reign' podcast that she was genuinely worried that she "wouldn't get there if [she] was out and open about who [she] was." Thankfully, she came out anyway and has enjoyed real success. "It's just a real journey of figuring out, 'No, you don't have to do any of that!'"
© Getty Images
24 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Bailey -
'Bridgerton' star Jonathan Bailey told Attitude that the majority of the conversations in which he was told to stay in the closet were actually with other gay men in the industry. He heard them out, but made his own decision.
© Getty Images
25 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Bailey -
Bailey explained that publicists and casting directors would always tread very hesitantly around openly gay roles in 'gay productions.' "There's a sense of shame, I think, that's palpable throughout gay men within the industry," he added.
© Getty Images
26 / 35 Fotos
Lauren Jauregui -
As a member of Fifth Harmony, Lauren Jauregui was on an upward trajectory in the music industry. But with fame came increasing comments from her family and friends advising her to keep her bisexuality a secret.
© Getty Images
27 / 35 Fotos
Lauren Jauregui -
"A lot of artists are held back by the notion that they'll lose their fan base or alienate themselves," Jauregui told Out. "But the more I thought about it, the more I was like, why?"
© Getty Images
28 / 35 Fotos
Matt Dallas -
'Kyle XY' star Matt Dallas said in a Q and A video, "I was told to stay in the closet, not talk about my sexuality, to be on every red carpet with a girl on my arms because you could not be successful if you were openly gay in the entertainment industry, at least in front of the camera."
© Getty Images
29 / 35 Fotos
Matt Dallas -
Unfortunately, he's still feeling the mental repercussions of such a harmful notion. "I became very disconnected from who I was, and there's a lot of residual [stuff] that to this day I still deal with where I find myself [thinking] 'Oh, I sound too gay' or 'I'm acting too gay' because it was so drilled into my brain."
© Getty Images
30 / 35 Fotos
Olly Alexander -
When British singer Olly Alexander's band Years and Years took off, his publicist advised him not to speak openly about his sexuality. Luckily, he didn't take her advice, citing the debt he owed to his younger self.
© Getty Images
31 / 35 Fotos
Olly Alexander -
"When a journalist did ask me about my sexuality, I said 'Yes, I'm gay and this song is about a man,'" Alexander told Elle UK. "I needed to say that for my 15-year-old self. I needed to say to him, 'Look, we are not hiding any more.'" Fortunately, he was met with incredible support from his fans.
© Getty Images
32 / 35 Fotos
Sarah Paulson -
Not only is Paulson queer, but when she began dating Holland Taylor, who is 32 years older than her, she was advised to keep her relationship under wraps in order to protect her career.
© Getty Images
33 / 35 Fotos
Sarah Paulson -
"Early on, when people found out I was with Holland, some said: 'I think you have to be careful, I'm afraid it's going to affect your career negatively.' I was like, what? It never occurred to me at all," Paulson told The Edit.
Sources: (Short List) (Too Fab) (StyleCaster)
See also: You won't believe these stars once dated each other
© Getty Images
34 / 35 Fotos
©
Getty Images
0 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Knight -
Jonathan Knight was told his career would be over if he came out. The New Kids On The Block singer spoke on the 'Frosted Tips with Lance Bass' podcast about his experience in the band's early years and explained that his manager knew he was gay. "He pulled me aside and was like, 'If anybody finds out, your career is over. The New Kids' career is over. My career is over,'" Knight recalled. "It was just so much pressure."
"Looking back, that was a lot of pressure to put on somebody who's just trying to figure out the world themselves," he continued. "As it went along, the stress built up and built up and built up." It filled him with anxiety, and yet it was still several years before he came out—and not by his own choice.
© Getty Images
1 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Knight -
Knight was outed after his then-boyfriend sold photos of them to the National Enquirer, though he still didn't want to make a formal announcement. "I didn't want to. I was just living my life... it wasn't something I was hiding," he recalled. "But then it was like, 'No, you have to make a statement. You have to clear the air.' And that whole process was horrible." It was a huge injustice to Knight every step of the way, but fortunately times have changed, and now he's happily married to longtime partner Harley Rodriguez.
©
Getty Images
2 / 35 Fotos
Ricky Martin -
In an interview for People's Pride issue, the singer recalled being asked about his sexuality—something he'd not yet shared—on TV by Barbara Walters. When Walters asked him to shut down the rumors that he was gay, he refused to answer at first, then eventually said, "I just don't feel like it."
©
Getty Images
3 / 35 Fotos
Ricky Martin -
Martin later explained in 2018, eight years after coming out, on 'The Daily Show' that the decision to come out had been so difficult because his loved ones were telling him it would end his career. Being confronted on TV about it, and being encouraged to "shut down the rumors" was a violating experience, and the singer admitted that he still has "a little PTSD" when he thinks back on Walters' invasive interview.
©
Getty Images
4 / 35 Fotos
Kristen Stewart -
The actress told Harper's Bazaar UK that she was informed very early on in her career, by "an old school mentality," that she shouldn't discuss her personal life because people might not like it, and even that she should stop going out publicly with her girlfriend so that she could get bigger roles.
©
Getty Images
5 / 35 Fotos
Kristen Stewart -
"I've fully been told, 'If you just do yourself a favor and don't go out holding your girlfriend's hand in public, you might get a Marvel movie,'" she said. "I don't want to work with people like that."
©
Getty Images
6 / 35 Fotos
Colton Haynes -
The 'Arrow' star said that almost immediately after moving to LA to pursue acting, he was told he couldn't come out as gay. That kicked off years of internal struggle, which sadly landed Haynes in rehab for anxiety.
©
Getty Images
7 / 35 Fotos
Colton Haynes -
"I was literally told from the day that I moved to Los Angeles that I could not be gay because I wouldn't work. Then I was with my management team and a team of people that just literally told me I couldn't be this way. They tried to set me up with girls," Colton told Andy Cohen, explaining that all his rumored hetero romances were lies.
©
Getty Images
8 / 35 Fotos
Cara Delevingne -
The model and actress was once told by Harvey Weinstein that she would never make it in Hollywood as a queer woman. She said he advised her to date men to cover it up, while also making inappropriate comments about her relationships with women.
©
Getty Images
9 / 35 Fotos
Cara Delevingne -
"One of the first things Harvey Weinstein ever said to me was, 'You will never make it in this industry as a gay woman—get a beard,'" Delevingne told Porter.
©
Getty Images
10 / 35 Fotos
Ezra Miller -
The 'Flash' actor came out in a 2012 interview, but it wasn't so simple. They wouldn't name names, but Miller said people both inside and outside the industry lectured them on having "done a 'silly' thing in... thwarting my own potential to be a leading man." Miller said they received "a lot of stern talking-tos" after the interview and was told that they had "made a mistake" by being honest.
©
Getty Images
11 / 35 Fotos
Ezra Miller -
"I didn't think I'd done anything wrong, though there have been moments of doubt as a result of those conversations," Miller told ShortList. "But...what they said was, in fact, 'rubbish.' We are the ones. It's up to us to manifest the world we want to exist in."
©
Getty Images
12 / 35 Fotos
Evan Rachel Wood -
The successful actress came out as bisexual in 2011, but she was advised not to. "They tell you flat out—'Don't do it.' They don't want you to be less desirable to men," she told IndieWire. "Because that sells tickets and that helps your career."
©
Getty Images
13 / 35 Fotos
Evan Rachel Wood -
Fortunately, Wood added, "Nothing happened that people told me was going to happen...You might be leaving one community behind but you're getting embraced by another."
©
Getty Images
14 / 35 Fotos
Raven-Symoné -
The former star of Disney Channel's 'That's So Raven' has since opened up about how the network controlled her image while growing up, which included her sexuality.
©
Getty Images
15 / 35 Fotos
Raven-Symoné -
She said she knew she was a lesbian at age 12 but only came out in 2013, after her run with Disney. "My likeness, whether you see it in an interview, whether you see it in print, however you see it at that time, had 15 people dictating what I should and should not look like. If I did whatever I want, I'm not going to sell because it doesn't go with the brand. I was branded at such a young age," she told L/Studio.
©
Getty Images
16 / 35 Fotos
Elliot Page -
Before Elliot Page came out as a transgender man, he came out as a lesbian, against the advice of many in the entertainment industry. "There's this narrative that people are attached to: You cannot come out because it's going to hurt your career," Page told Variety. "And that's potentially true. When I made the decision to come out, I wasn't naive to that."
©
Getty Images
17 / 35 Fotos
Elliot Page -
Page added that back then he was "pressured—forced, in many cases—to always wear dresses and heels for events and photo shoots. As if lesbians don't wear dresses and heels. But I will never let anyone put me in anything I feel uncomfortable in ever again," Page told Net-a-Porter.
©
Getty Images
18 / 35 Fotos
Amber Heard -
After she came out as bisexual, the actress was told that she was "throwing away" her career, which at the time was landing roles opposite the likes of Nicolas Cage and Johnny Depp.
©
Getty Images
19 / 35 Fotos
Amber Heard -
She said that people advised her to stay in the closet for the sake of her career. "And I said, 'I cannot do this any other way. Watch me,'" Heard told Allure. "They pointed to no other working romantic lead, no other actress, that was out."
©
Getty Images
20 / 35 Fotos
Matt Bomer -
The 'White Collar' actor decided to come out at a pivotal moment in his career, when the risks were made very clear to him. "I had a studio film that was about to premiere, and a television series coming out. But to me it was more important to be my most authentic self, both for my family, and for myself," he told Attitude.
©
Getty Images
21 / 35 Fotos
Matt Bomer -
He has no regrets about coming out, but he acknowledged that it certainly wasn't a fairy-tale process. "To say that didn't cost me certain things in my career would be a lie. It did. To me that trade-off was worth it," he added.
©
Getty Images
22 / 35 Fotos
Samira Wiley -
Early in the 'Handmaid's Tale' actress' career, she was encouraged to hide the fact that she is a lesbian. Wiley even said that it was suggested that she pretend to date her gay male friend to cover up both of their sexualities.
©
Getty Images
23 / 35 Fotos
Samira Wiley -
Wiley said on the 'Make It Reign' podcast that she was genuinely worried that she "wouldn't get there if [she] was out and open about who [she] was." Thankfully, she came out anyway and has enjoyed real success. "It's just a real journey of figuring out, 'No, you don't have to do any of that!'"
©
Getty Images
24 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Bailey -
'Bridgerton' star Jonathan Bailey told Attitude that the majority of the conversations in which he was told to stay in the closet were actually with other gay men in the industry. He heard them out, but made his own decision.
©
Getty Images
25 / 35 Fotos
Jonathan Bailey -
Bailey explained that publicists and casting directors would always tread very hesitantly around openly gay roles in 'gay productions.' "There's a sense of shame, I think, that's palpable throughout gay men within the industry," he added.
©
Getty Images
26 / 35 Fotos
Lauren Jauregui -
As a member of Fifth Harmony, Lauren Jauregui was on an upward trajectory in the music industry. But with fame came increasing comments from her family and friends advising her to keep her bisexuality a secret.
©
Getty Images
27 / 35 Fotos
Lauren Jauregui -
"A lot of artists are held back by the notion that they'll lose their fan base or alienate themselves," Jauregui told Out. "But the more I thought about it, the more I was like, why?"
©
Getty Images
28 / 35 Fotos
Matt Dallas -
'Kyle XY' star Matt Dallas said in a Q and A video, "I was told to stay in the closet, not talk about my sexuality, to be on every red carpet with a girl on my arms because you could not be successful if you were openly gay in the entertainment industry, at least in front of the camera."
©
Getty Images
29 / 35 Fotos
Matt Dallas -
Unfortunately, he's still feeling the mental repercussions of such a harmful notion. "I became very disconnected from who I was, and there's a lot of residual [stuff] that to this day I still deal with where I find myself [thinking] 'Oh, I sound too gay' or 'I'm acting too gay' because it was so drilled into my brain."
©
Getty Images
30 / 35 Fotos
Olly Alexander -
When British singer Olly Alexander's band Years and Years took off, his publicist advised him not to speak openly about his sexuality. Luckily, he didn't take her advice, citing the debt he owed to his younger self.
©
Getty Images
31 / 35 Fotos
Olly Alexander -
"When a journalist did ask me about my sexuality, I said 'Yes, I'm gay and this song is about a man,'" Alexander told Elle UK. "I needed to say that for my 15-year-old self. I needed to say to him, 'Look, we are not hiding any more.'" Fortunately, he was met with incredible support from his fans.
©
Getty Images
32 / 35 Fotos
Sarah Paulson -
Not only is Paulson queer, but when she began dating Holland Taylor, who is 32 years older than her, she was advised to keep her relationship under wraps in order to protect her career.
©
Getty Images
33 / 35 Fotos
Sarah Paulson -
"Early on, when people found out I was with Holland, some said: 'I think you have to be careful, I'm afraid it's going to affect your career negatively.' I was like, what? It never occurred to me at all," Paulson told The Edit.
Sources: (Short List) (Too Fab) (StyleCaster)
See also: You won't believe these stars once dated each other
©
Getty Images
34 / 35 Fotos
LGBTQ+ stars who were told to stay in the closet
But who came out anyway
© Getty Images
Coming out as a member of the LGBTQ+ community, though it is increasingly celebratory, remains a very difficult thing to do. That challenge is only amplified when your entire career rides on your public image, as it does for so many actors and musicians.
We all know the struggle to come to terms with one's sexuality can be hard enough, but even when a person is ready to share their authentic self with the world, it can be extremely disheartening to feel like the world isn't ready to hear it. Many LGBTQ+ celebrities have even been pressured to stay in the closet, either by agents, casting directors, friends, or family, despite having expressed the desire to come out.
Click through this gallery to see the stars who have been advised at one point or another to stay in the closet for the sake of their career. And let's celebrate the fact that they didn't!
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